Shocker – My Kid is 12 & I Can’t Access my Child’s Medical Record? How Does This Work??

HIPAA Age 12: Don’t Worry, Your Child’s Medical Record Isn’t Completely Locked Away From You

I was shocked when I suddenly couldn’t access my 12-year-old daughter’s medical records via my hospital account.

We were pretty sure she had coronavirus and I wanted to access her test results as soon as they came in, but because she was now 12, she had to create her own account with any Grand Rapids doctors.  


This 6th grader, who could barely navigate turning in homework on time, told me to set up the account for her and save the login myself. She has zero interest in dealing with medical records. 

But apparently 12 is the age that a child can start managing their own medical information??

HIPAA age 12 means a child's medical record can become private.
Seriously, most 12-year-olds are more concerned with having fun than managing their health records.

This freaked me out until I learned that HIPAA age 12 didn’t mean I had to hand over the reigns to a clueless kid.

The hospital wasn’t going to shut me out of my child’s health journey and they won’t leave important decisions to a 12-year-old. 

According to University of Michigan Health-West, parents are still expected to manage their child’s care up to age 18. Phew! 

But seeing your child’s medical record turn over to your kid at age 12 is a good indicator to start the conversation about managing their health info.

University of Michigan Health-West family practice physician Elizabeth Albright, DO, says, “The sooner a teen is engaged in his or her healthcare, the better and more successful their treatment will be long-term.”

Teach Kids to Manage Their Medical Records so They’re Ready When They Turn 18

Let’s start with the legalities of healthcare management.

From a federal and state standpoint, there are regulations that drive how healthcare facilities and parents/guardians must treat and manage a child’s medical record under 18. 

“Since minors are not legal adults (unless emancipated), parents are the voice of their child at the doctor’s office,” says UM Health-West privacy officer Gavin Faas. 

“The child can advocate for themselves—and should—but the responsibility ultimately falls on the parent.”

Parents of minors also have access to, and control of, their child’s protected health information (PHI), aka their child’s medical record, under HIPAA.

While teens can access their own health information through patient portals like UM Health-West’s MyChart, parents have the right to decide what information is visible. 

“Parents must balance protecting their children while at the same time empowering them and promoting their ability to become independent decision makers,” Faas notes.

While it sounds scary to let a 12-year-old loose with medical information, it’s even scarier to me to let my 18-year-old loose with it when she’s never been taught a thing about what her records mean and how to handle them.

If we start talking about a child’s medical record when they are 12, they’ll have a better understanding of what to do when they move out on their own. 

Child’s Medical Record: Help Teens Manage Info, Learn Medication Use & Know Family History

To ensure that both you and your child are ready to shift healthcare control when they turn 18, it’s important to start conversations early. 

Dr. Albright says that age 12 is a good time for kids to start taking a more active role in their healthcare.

“At this age, I start talking with teens one-on-one about sensitive topics to allow time for them to engage without their parent present. This also helps them get used to seeing a provider on their own.”

Dr. Albright says it’s important teens are given the opportunity to vocalize their symptoms and explain what they’re feeling in their own words.

This will prepare them for the day when a parent isn’t around to do the talking for them. Even allowing them to attend doctor’s appointments on their own can help build confidence.

My daughter has a well-check appointment next week with her pediatrician.

I’ve been asking her probing questions and encouraging her to observe how she’s been feeling so she can ask him about any issues she’s been having. And when the appointment arrives, I’m going to let her do the talking. 

If you’re wondering about medication use, Dr. Albright says most teens are self-reliant enough to manage their own medications around age 15-16.

Make sure they’re not only responsible enough to remember to take medication on their own, but also when to take it and how it’s prescribed.

Another topic Dr. Albright says is important for parents to discuss with their teen early on is family health history. 

“Talk to your child about medical conditions that run in the family such as heart disease, high blood pressure, stroke, certain cancers and diabetes.”

“Before they reach adulthood, your child should be able to answer family health history questions without needing your help. Then, keep your child informed of changes in family health history whenever they arise.”

A Child’s Medical Record at Age 18: They’re Still Under Your Insurance, but They Have to Manage Their own Appointments and Decisions

Once your child turns 18, get ready for some significant healthcare changes, and not just to your child’s medical record. Even if you’re still footing the bill.

“The biggest change is that an 18-year-old has to make his or her own appointments and manage their own healthcare with their doctor,” says Faas. 

Sorry, dad. You cannot do this for them anymore, due to privacy laws. (Unless you sign an authorization form for your child’s medical record.)

“UM Health-West has a Permission to Discuss form that the patient can fill out and add anyone with whom their doctor may discuss their medical information.”

“This transition can be unnerving for teens and parents,” Dr. Albright shares.

“Many teens have always relied on a parent to make decisions or answer questions. When they come in for that first adult visit on their own, it can be overwhelming.”

I think I’m going to let my daughter call to make her own doctor appointments once she’s in high school.

She can always defer to me with questions, but it’s a safe time for her to test out this new independence while I’m still legally allowed to be involved. Then when she’s 18, it won’t be all new to her. 

Dr. Albright says there are some young adults who are over-reliant on a parent and request that the parent call with questions or help with health management.

If permission has not been given for this, the healthcare provider cannot legally discuss the teen’s health with the parent.

“This can cause confusion and dissatisfaction to the patient and/or parent. That’s why being comfortable and prepared for these situations at the onset of adulthood is important in alleviating issues,” she explains.

Additionally, parental access to the child’s medical record via the patient portal account will be automatically removed once he or she turns 18. 

If your child remains on your insurance, insurance companies will still send an Explanation of Benefits to you when your child visits the doctor.

HIPAA allows for those who are paying for the medical care to receive protected health information that is specific to that visit.

Your Child Will Become an Adult Whether You’re Ready or Not. 

If giving your child control of their healthcare still has you on edge, remember you’re already giving them autonomy in other ways. 

You’re counting on them to wear their seatbelt and bike helmets when you’re not around. You trust them as they get older to avoid smoking and alcohol use. You let them borrow the family car—albeit maybe begrudgingly. 

All of these things together are helping to build confidence and independence. Handing over the keys to their own healthcare management and child’s medical record is just part of that journey.

Now that I’m thinking about it, maybe I should have my daughter log into her own account and look around, even though it makes me a little sad to think that my little baby is growing into an adult! 

Prepare your child—and yourself—well enough in advance and when adulthood comes, the tears you shed will be tears of joy. Because, let’s be honest, you’ll definitely cry!

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2 thoughts on “Shocker – My Kid is 12 & I Can’t Access my Child’s Medical Record? How Does This Work??”

  1. Great way of explaining this. The is the first and only article that does not come off like an anti-parent message looking to undermine parents as if we are an obstacle to our own children receiving healthcare. I have been appalled at the way this all has been communicated verbally and in writing online, online portals, pediatricians and on their office sites. Parents deserve better!! We wish to raise confident and independent kids to grow up and take on responsibility. Far too often the intend, goal and message is explained AND delivered poorly leaving parents to be undermined in the eyes of their own kids only causing damage to the idea that kids can and should talk with their parents. After all they do live with us 24/7 days a week. Kids make better decisions about their healthcare when open communication is encouraged by their healthcare team and the parents are stable people. It’s all in the delivery!!!!

  2. This all sounds great, but. My granddaughter is 12, she takes medication daily. When my daughter went on line to refill that medication she wasn’t allowed to. She can call the pharmacy to refill it and she can go pick it up but they won’t let her know when it is ready to be picked up. They have Kaiser. Kaiser says that my 12 year old granddaughter has to be 13 to set up her own account. My daughter has NO access to her 12 year old’s medical information on line now but her daughter can’t set up her own account until she’s 13. How does this make any sense at all?

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